June 1st is World Narcissistic Abuse Awareness Day (WNAAD). #ifmywoundswerevisible
Narcissistic abuse is hard to see if you don’t know what to look for. It is covert and thrives in silence. Awareness is important. Once you know what this kind of abuse looks like, you can protect yourself. (You can also check to make sure you are treating other people well!)
We can’t change anyone else, but we can educate ourselves on what is healthy and what is toxic and choose health.
“Narcissistic abuse does not usually include forms of physical abuse with physical signs like bruises. The signs of narcissistic abuse are invisible, which makes it much harder to identify. The abuse is more ambiguous and difficult to prove, but it is no less damaging because it’s a form of spiritual rape. Over time, the abuse chips away at the target’s self-confidence and self-esteem. The target isn’t even aware it’s happening until the damage has been done. The abuse is always about control.”
Bree Bonchay, LCSW, and founder of World Narcissistic Abuse Awareness Day
To learn more about narcissistic abuse here are some articles:
“As the relationship becomes more established, you may start to see some stronger warning signs, or red flags, such as; You may spot bigger lies, and when you confront them, you never get a straight answer or they will turn it around and accuse you of what they’re actually doing.”
11 Things I Learned About Narcissists And Sociopaths By Age 27 – That I Wish Everyone Knew
“There is a spectrum of toxicity, but those who are on the high end of that spectrum, like malignant narcissists, are unlikely to change.”
“Trauma bonding is a bond that develops when two people undergo intense, risky emotional experiences together. In the context of an abusive relationship, this bond is strengthened due to the heightened intimacy and danger. Similar to the way Stockholm Syndrome manifests, the abuse victim bonds with his or her abuser as both the source of terror and comfort in an attempt to survive the tumultuous relationship. As a result, abuse victims feel a misplaced, unshakeable sense of loyalty and devotion to their abusers, which to an outsider may appear nonsensical.”
11 Signs You’re the Victim of Narcissistic Abuse
“Psychological violence by malignant narcissists can include verbal and emotional abuse, toxic projection, stonewalling, sabotage, smear campaigns, triangulation along with a plethora of other forms of coercion and control. This is imposed by someone who lacks empathy, demonstrates an excessive sense of entitlement and engages in interpersonal exploitation to meet their own needs at the expense of the rights of others.”
“Abusers lack empathy and choose to hurt people to get what they want because they feel entitled. Covert abusers use underhanded ways to get what they want so they can hide their aggressive agendas and manipulations. They aren’t the least bit interested in a mutual relationship with shared decision-making and control.”
How to Know if Your Marriage Crosses the Line From Normal to Abusive
“Emotional abuse is an epidemic in conservative Christian circles where there is a built-in belief system that says men are supposed to be in a power-over position related to women…. this erroneous belief feeds into the underlying attitudes as well as subtle and not-so-subtle behaviors of men toward women. The practical outcome of such attitudes and behaviors is the destruction of women and children from the inside out.”
It is essential to tap into your intuition and listen to it. If something feels off, it probably is. Talking about Narcissists in her book Why Is It Always About You? Sandy Hotchkiss says, “It is not uncommon, in the presence of such individuals, to feel controlled, manipulated, helpless, and angry—or on an emotional rollercoaster ride.” (9)
There can be a lot to learn about abuse. Another way to learn is by reading stories of survivors. You can read my story in my upcoming book, Did He Hit You? available June 11th on Amazon.
Photo by Thought Catalog on Unsplash
2 Comments
Thank you for the bountiful resources! I cant wait to read your book, Aubri.
I’m excited for you to read it and hear what you think!