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depression

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It’s strange for me to share something like this. I don’t always know how to talk about my struggle with depression, and I usually don’t want to. Sometimes I feel like there are multiple versions of myself and they appear at different times. I feel so completely one way one day and then the opposite the next. Despite my desire to not talk about it, depression is something that needs to be talked about. It’s something that can be helpful when learned through the eyes of those in the midst of the battle. Often I find it easier to say that I have anxiety, but not depression because it comes with so many more negative stigmas. I don’t want to be looked down on. I don’t want to be seen as sick or messed up. I don’t want to be broken. I don’t want sympathy. I’m not lazy when I lack…

When a pumpkin spice latte doesn’t make you feel better… perhaps something is wrong. There are a lot of people who are excited about fall. But this year, I’m not one of them. The long nights and the rainy days, the gloomy cloudy rainy dark days and nights: fall begins them all. I don’t completely hate this time of year. I like the colder nights, snuggling up with a giant fuzzy blanket and a bunch of pillows. I like everything pumpkin. I do sometimes like the excuse to stay in and not feel guilty because it’s raining. I however struggle with depression and the weather affects me. When it isn’t sunny out, I feel less hopeful and less motivated. I wish I could explain this in a way that makes sense to those who don’t know what that is like, but I don’t know that I can. The first day…