Resources
You are not alone. Here are tools, articles, and support. A curated library for anyone navigating an abusive relationship, recovering from one, supporting someone who is, or simply trying to understand the dynamics of harm.
Articles on Abuse & Understanding the Signs
Recognizing Abuse
- Domestic Violence and Abuse: Recognizing the Signs of Abusive Relationships and Getting Help
Explains the signs of domestic abuse and how to get help. Read - Many Types of Abuse
Outlines examples of each type of abuse. Read - Top Warning Signs of Domestic Abuse
Helps you figure out if someone you know is being abused. Read - Do You Think You’re Being Abused?
“Look over the following questions. Think about how you are being treated and how you treat your partner. Remember, when one person scares, hurts, or continually puts down the other person, it is abuse.” Read
Emotional & Psychological Abuse
- Dating Emotional Predators: Signs to Look Out For
“Dating an emotional predator, a narcissist, a sociopath or anyone else who has the potential to be an abusive or toxic influence in your life is a devastating emotional roller coaster of highs and lows.” Read - How to Recognize the Signs of Mental and Emotional Abuse
“You probably know many of the more obvious signs of mental and emotional abuse. But when you’re in the midst of it, it can be easy to miss the persistent undercurrent of abusive behavior.” Read - The Warning Signs of an Abusive Relationship
“Here are some warning signs you may be in a controlling or abusive relationship.” Read - You’re Not Going Crazy: 5 Sure Signs You’re Being Emotionally Abused
“Because emotional abuse has become such a popular topic in the self-help and psychology fields, you may already be familiar with some of its signs, which may include withdrawal of affection, name-calling, and control. But if you suspect you’re in an emotionally abusive relationship, you may be so immersed in it that you can’t read the very destructive handwriting on the wall. Emotional abuse becomes, in a sense, your blurred normal.” Read
Online Support & Information
Ending Violence Association of BC
Battered Women’s Support Services
Shelter Safe
Understanding Domestic Abuse
When Love Hurts: A Woman’s Guide to Understanding Abuse in Relationships
by Jill Cory and Karen McAndless-Davis
Everyone should read this book but especially if you suspect you might be in an abusive relationship. You’ll find a lot of useful information including how victims are impacted by abuse, descriptions of the types of abuse, and what an abusive belief system is.
No Visible Bruises: What We Don’t Know About Domestic Violence Can Kill Us
by Rachel Louise Snyder
A journalist’s investigation into the world of domestic violence. A lot of helpful and important information if you have been in a domestic violence situation or you are helping someone who is.
If He’s So Great, Why Do I Feel So Bad?: Recognizing and Overcoming Subtle Abuse
by Avery Neal
Unlock the path to healing with If He’s so Great, Why Do I Feel So Bad?, that helps you recognize the subtle signs of psychological abuse that often go unnoticed, empowering you to identify toxic patterns and reclaim your life. With practical insights on setting boundaries and letting go of fear, this essential guide will support you in fostering a happy, healthy, and fulfilling existence, free from shame and blame.
Currently Experiencing Abuse
Should I Stay or Should I Go? A Guide to Knowing if Your Relationship Can—and Should—be Saved
by Lundy Bancroft and JAC Patrissi
In this warm and straightforward guide, the author helps you assess your relationship, providing practical advice to distinguish between a challenging but healthy partnership and one that may be fundamentally flawed. With exercises and insights, the book empowers you to prioritize your own growth, recognize red flags in your partner, and create a clear plan for either improving the relationship or preparing for a life apart.
Daily Wisdom for Why Does He Do That? Encouragement for Women Involved with Angry and Controlling Men
by Lundy Bancroft
If you are in an abusive relationship this book has encouragement for your day-to-day. Short chapters with helpful insights and encouragement and knowledge.
Understanding Abusive Men
Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men
by Lundy Bancroft
This is must-read if you want to understand why abusive and controlling men do what they do.
Healing From Abuse
Healing from Hidden Abuse: A Journey Through the Stages of Recovery from Psychological Abuse
by Shannon Thomas
If you’ve experienced hidden abuse and are ready to start healing from it, Healing from Hidden Abuse is a great start. It speaks to hidden abuse in toxic workplaces, relationships, churches, and families.
Psychopath Free (Expanded Edition): Recovering from Emotionally Abusive Relationships With Narcissists, Sociopaths, and Other Toxic People
by Jackson MacKenzie
Have you ever felt confused and emotionally drained in a relationship? You might have unknowingly encountered a psychopath—cunning charmers who manipulate and exploit, making extreme behaviours seem normal. Psychopath Free offers invaluable insights and survivor experiences that help you recognize these toxic relationships. Written by a survivor for survivors, this guide empowers you to break free from chaos and self-doubt, providing hope for healing and a path to reclaiming your life.
Whole Again: Healing Your Heart and Rediscovering Your True Self After Toxic Relationships and Emotional Abuse
by Jackson MacKenzie
Whole Again is a powerful guide for healing after toxic relationships. Expanding on his previous work, Psychopath Free, it offers essential strategies to move past trauma and reclaim your true self. He addresses lingering symptoms like numbness and toxic shame, providing practical tools and mindfulness exercises to help readers uncover their core selves and embrace love authentically. With insights into issues like PTSD, narcissistic abuse, and codependency, this book is a vital resource for anyone ready to heal and feel whole again.
Lower Mainland (Canada)
Domestic Violence – HealthLinkBC
Phone numbers and information for BC residents.
SARA For Women
Mission and Abbotsford, BC
Ishtar Women’s Resource Society
Langley, BC
Monarch Place Transition House
New Westminster, BC
United States
The National Domestic Violence Hotline
Operating around the clock, seven days a week, confidential and free of cost, the National Domestic Violence Hotline provides lifesaving tools and immediate support to enable victims to find safety and live lives free of abuse.
Safe Horizon
Safe Horizon’s mission is to provide support, prevent violence and promote justice for victims of crime and abuse, their families and communities.
Updated: September 2024
*books contain affiliate links
You are not alone.
Educating yourself and others about abuse is the best way to prevent and heal from abuse.
